


Birdwatching

by TheatricalAssassin



Series: Born of the Cosmos [2]
Category: Max Steel (TV 2013)
Genre: Animal Transformation, Birds, Extroyer is a hunter ok, Gen, Humor, Hunters & Hunting, I Was Drunk When I Wrote This, Shapeshifting, Transformation, he's hunting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-11-21 20:21:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11364924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheatricalAssassin/pseuds/TheatricalAssassin
Summary: Trying to get around with any kind of efficiency and without raisingtoo muchsuspicion is very hard when the citizens of Copper Canyon can look up and see a giant spider sailing through the air.This means it's time for a change, and change is one of the things that Extroyer is good at.





	Birdwatching

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a shitpost
> 
> I was actually shocked to find out that Vin and Dwayne don't have last names.
> 
> My drink of choice was kaluha and cream, i was working on With Friends Like These until i started drinking, because i should be sober for something like tht.
> 
> also best listened to synth/retrowave while reading because it does kind of set the mood for this nonsense

Copper Canyon is a largely agreeable city. For a while he wasn’t sure what he could do in this shithole of a city. Oh it was a great tourist spot, that’s for sure. It was close enough to the cost to have a boardwalk, there was all sorts of sights and nonsense for out-of-towners to waste their money on. However whenever it came to what  _ he _ needed? There was  _ nothing _ . Looking at his situation now, Extroyer had to come to terms with something a long time ago. He was flat broke. His home was destroyed by Dredd, he’s been reduced to digging out of the trash, and worst of all? He cannot afford better subordinates. As much as he hates Vin and Dwayne, they’re all he’s got. Who for some reason stay by his side no matter what, possibly because he’s still paying them. A steady paycheck is a steady paycheck after all. 

Speaking of which they were out. Given his... visage. Extroyer couldn’t just walk out on the town, he had to send them out on his errands, and knowing them they’d fucked off somewhere and wouldn’t be back till god knows when. He tapped his fingers absentmindedly against the table, the sound of crystal against wood was a rare sound, one that he got to hear often. He could do some workouts, keep in shape and always be ready for Max Steel to be snooping around. He could also just not do that. 

Extroyer thought about some of his getaways. They were all very close, and they took a lot of effort. Most of the time if he was outside city limits he wasn’t able to do his usual thing, which was take the form of a spider and float away on a string of web. Out in the desert, he was about as effective as Spider-Man on the Kent Farm. He needed something else, something that would be effective in any situation, one that’s combat ready  _ and _ good for an escape. He needs a new form. 

He slid on over to his computer, Vin had went and gotten him a keyboard that only required the use of one hand. He didn’t ask him to, but after tearing apart Yet Another Keyboard with his crystallized hand Vin replaced it with this one. The gesture was much appreciated, as he’s yet to break one by simply using it as intended. He pulled up the webpage for the Copper Canyon Zoo, it was a fair sized so there was a good chance that they’d have a bird of prey that’d fit his needs. 

Unfortunately the coffee shop next door had internet that was worse than dial up, shocking because it’s after seven and there shouldn’t be anyone there sucking up all the bandwidth. After thirty centuries and a quick shave for his Rip Van Winkle Beard Extroyer was able to pull up the page for the Aviary. Most of what they had was... expected for a zoo. A fair amount of tropical birds, some budgies, tourist stuff. However further down the page he saw it. A Bearded Vulture. 

Bearded Vultures he knew subsisted on a diet of bones. Any bird that was able to eat that should be  _ more _ than enough for him to use in a pinch, as well as it’s obvious aerial superiority. 

Except for the part that Max Steel can break the sound barrier but lets ignore that. 

He pulled the address off the website and headed for the alleyway. As soon as he stepped out the city air filled his lungs, it was just as terrible as the other thirty times he came out to do something. He took a running start and made his way up the wall before shifting into his tiger form, the cronch of his bones a pain he still wasn’t used to but it was getting easier to recover from. 

He’d done these rooftop runs a million times, and there was no possible way that Max Steel would be out this way. How did he know? Because Max Steel is like 5 and he rarely sees him in this side of town after dark. So getting to the zoo will just be one smooth run on the gravy train. On the horizon he could hear the zoo coming up, this should go nicely. This is a zoo, they don’t really  _ do _ security beyond keeping the animals  _ in _ and the people with a deathwish  _ out _ . Luckily he falls into both of those categories and no one exactly knows how to plan for a man that’s sometimes a shark and a shark that’s sometimes a spider and a spider that’s sometimes a jackass. 

Once he actually got to the zoo, he just, jumped over the fence. Since the cameras would already see that he was here there was no reason to leave more evidence. Besides that’s just petty and he might have to come back. They can’t exactly plan for someone who’s whole plan to get inside was  _ up _ . Striding leisurely through the place he managed to find the aviary. Here, The Crystal Jackass, has two options. One, try to pick the lock and leave the door to the birds intact for their safety. Or two, just kick the shit in and grab the feathery bastard. Had Extroyer been anyone else, or at least carried and ounce of sense, he would have gone with one. 

However that is assuming he hadn’t already kicked the door in and was already trying to find the birds of prey. The vultures would likely have their own exhibit but not that it would matter much, he just needed it for a second. Once he came upon it he realized, if he just broke the glass or plastic or whatever it was separating the birds and him, it was likely that he’d hurt the birds. Extroyer wasn’t one who particularly cared about these things, but the fact that he didn’t know if this would have an effect on him made him hesitate. 

“Well I guess I’ll just have to pull out some old heist tricks” He said aloud to no one in particular. 

Placing his non-crystal hand on the barrier he took his crystallized index finger and carved deep into it making a perfect circle. Once he removed both of his hands from the barrier the glass shattered into a million pieces. 

“Well.... that happened.” He said looking at the one perfect circle that he’d carved from the glass. 

The vultures were staring at him with disdain, previously they’d been sleeping but thanks to this rude motherfucker who was now standing before them they were awake. They didn’t mind humans too much but this guy whatever he was they knew he was bad news. Once Extroyer started to climb into the enclosure they attacked. Shrieking battle cries they dug into him with razor sharp talons and bit him when the opportunity arose. Extroyer yelled in pain as he tried in vain to get these god forsaken birds to sit still long enough for him to acquire their form. After a good 15 minutes of struggle he shoves the birds back into their enclosure and he storms off. 

He didn’t acquire anything but several injuries, a bad mood, and the determination to make this spider hell form work because if this is what it takes to get a reasonable bird form then all birds can go to hell. By the time he’d gotten back to the hideout he found Vin and Dwayne had returned, the former on the phone with that sounded like a teacher and the latter sitting on the couch with take out. When they noticed that Extroyer had returned immediately they sprung into action to show that they’d accomplished what he’d asked them to do. Clearly trying very hard to ignore the fact that it looked like Extroyer lost a fight. 

Thank god he only asked them to stock up on medical supplies. 

**Author's Note:**

> i had to look up if zoos had their animals so i quickly googled the memphis zoo and they do so lets just assume that forwhatever reason CC zoo had a bearded vulture 
> 
> tl;dr of this fic? extroyer gets into a fight with a bird and he loses


End file.
